If you could have a dinner party and invite any 4 people, dead or alive, who'd be coming? Good ol' honest Abe Lincoln, Richard Pryor, Jim Jones and Michael Madsen. Boom.

Where are your local haunts? Sandy hut, Billy Rays, Lucky Devil, East bank esplanade.

How far will you travel to meet the right partner? TO THE ENDS OF THE EARTH!!!!!!

What movie does your life resemble most and why? Beatle juice, no real reason. I just really like that movie.Michael Keaton is a SAINT I tell ya! A SAINT!

If I could only eat one type of food for the rest of my life, it would be: Dog turds.

The first section I turn to in the Mercury is First page of show listings.

The quickest way to my heart is Through my chest The quickest way to my bed is Through my livingroom. And in the morning, I like my eggs cooked on the girlsd stomach like in the movie Hot Shots

The Thing I hate about Portland is? Hipsters The thing I love about Portland is? Hipsters

It's Sunday morning at 10 a.m. If I'm not still sleeping, I'm Plotting

The last concert/show I attended was... nofx

My favorite junk food is... Anything peanut butter

Great sex calls for lots of Stalking

The last time I made an ass out of myself, I Was super drunk

When stuck in gridlock I Take a nap

My picture(s) reveal that I am A white person

I want to make a t-shirt that says Free mustache rides

My beverage of choice is Vodka served With tonic

If I found a million dollars on the side of the road, I would Shit my pants

Michael Jackson was Bad

When I die, I believe I will go to get stuffed and placed in my brother's attic.

I wouldn't sell 10 billion dollars for a billion dollars.

MAX or Radio Cab

PBR or McMenamins

Dinner and a Movie or Pizza and a Rental

Cowboy or Indian

Cyndi Lauper or Britney

Makers Mark or Jack Daniels

Saucebox or Sandy Hut

Talk or Action

Hedwig or Darcelle

OPB or Any other TV

DIY or Buy

Water Fountain or Soda Fountain

Cat or Dog

Bath or Shower

Light on or Light off

Sunshine or Downpour